The New Me

We’ve been friends for more than 5 years now and we’ve grown closer for the past few months. We spend a lot of time together because of school works and because we live just across each other. We were classmates throughout high school and I swear I have feelings for him. I never planned to confess my feelings to him because it might ruin our friendship, and I don’t want a life-long relationship get ruined because of my feelings alone.

I lost to my feelings when I did confess, but to my best friend. She had a sour smile at first then she became giddy. It was weird to me at first but I figured she was just absorbing the information. Weeks passed and I my feelings for him just grew. The school year was almost over and we won’t be seeing each other next year for college. The last month of my senior year was really tedious and tenuous beside the preparation for prom. The last month of my senior year was also a crisis to me : my parents are getting divorced, my dog died, and I stopped talking to my best friend and to him. They were together, after all, and I thought at that time that for him not to know my feelings, I have to stay away from them. I trusted my best friend not to tell him, and she didn’t. All she did was destroy me. Like the typical posting hideous pictures of the younger me and telling gossips around the town. I thought she was just spreading gossips of me but what she was telling people was that my mom was a porn star and my dad divorced her because she’s pregnant again.

I became the class valedictorian, received all of the academic excellence and received a few special awards like campus journalist, leadership, etc. I thought I’d be fine now but everything was just starting.

College became my new life and I got accepted in a university thousands of miles away from my home town. My mom and I visit there sometimes and it was pretty fulfilling to see old high school friends get arrested because of drugs and theft. I don’t know why but I just feel happy. I haven’t seen my ex-best friend and her boyfriend for for four years and now I’m graduating, not as Magna Cum Laude though as prayed by my mother. I have a part-time as an assistant in a publishing house and being an exchange student helped me. Travelling the entire United States, Canada, and most of Europe and Asia helped me. Now I realize how far away I am from the high school me.

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