I had to ponder every outfit I had to wear for school, consider how to start my day the next day, and even think how I can live on my own someday. My parents don’t see things the way I see it. When I have a simple problem, it’s simple for them, too. But it’s a really complicated one for me that it takes the whole day to solve. Sometimes it’s so simple I’m willing to kill myself to get an easy out. How coward.
While they worked hard, I lived away from them. I learned things by myself in the not-so-good way. I learned how to quietly walked around my new environment without waking a sleeping soul, which helped feed me. I learned how to adapt to my new environment without making drastic changes, and I learned how to take in new information without letting others I was listening. They may be useless or nothing to others, but it helped me survive in this new environment.
While they worked hard, I did everything to improve – physically, intellectually and mentally. There was still that hint of dependence of me to them, but that’s only because I’m still the coward I was years ago. While they worked hard, my mind had to work hard, too. I had to work hard from the inside and I was really good at it that my new environment and my own parents didn’t notice.
While my parents worked hard, I went through periods of my life that were normal for me and not for them. I’ve done and thought of things they would never expect, I’ve changed from the inside and they haven’t seen it. While they worked hard, there was a different ‘me’ inside, and not just one me. I don’t even know how many different ‘me’ there are inside.
Because of them, I became both I wanted and did not want. Because of them, I’ve embraced who I am and who I’m not. Because of them, I became different persons.